餘勇可賈

這幾天,以斷捨離的方法壓縮論文字數,暫得9.94萬字,沒有超過10萬字。目前,還有幾百字的字額留給摘要及封面頁,其他的都已經有個初稿了。

很久沒有讀中史書了,最近翻閱了一篇近年的美國博士論文,研究重點不同,沒有仔細看。但我發現名校的論文格式也不是跟足芝加哥,我估我不會太差吧。自問這次留學的動機並不偉大,主要是想找個方法陪女兒讀書,雖然事情的發展不如所願,但既來之則安之,以完成學位為目標,難道要以復興偉大的中華文化為動機嗎?

如果求安身立命,我一定會選擇宗教研究。最近一直在想還有沒有可以再留學的機會。經濟上,仍可再撐一會,時間上,只能假設身體仍可再撐一會,但要說服別人取錄七旬老翁讀書,恐怕十分困難。我想試試申請南島 Otago 的神學院,但我的本科是幾十年前的,未必夠料,而且也沒有好題目,如果被嫌棄,就會放棄海外,退而求其次,選網上課程。英帝 Aberdeen有初期基督教碩士,標榜全網上,授課加論文,學費尚可,讀三年。三年之後,可以進修博士。Aberdeen有江湖地位,要認真考慮。再其次,美帝的母校也有網上班,好處是手續較便,缺點是時間長,費用高,科目也未必是自己感興趣的。至於教牧學博士之類,專攻實務,並非純學術的,我打算靜觀默想做隱者,不打算到處說法,不考慮了。

雖然是妄想,但妄想不會犯宇宙大法吧,我估。

(又及: 早前未能設定密碼的網頁,今天一舉解決了,有少少成就感。)

不亦樂乎

今晚,舊同事來紐西蘭旅遊,邀約晚飯,我欣然赴會。子曰:有朋自遠方來,不亦樂乎!信焉。

今天天氣認真麻麻,風雨交加。今晚7度,但因為大風,APP說體感是-5度,可幸路上只是微雨。

我選了一家中餐館,一來在彼此住處附近,二來那裡向來客人不多,久坐也不會遭溫馨提示。

原來已經六年沒有見面了,除了更新彼此別後情況外,也旁及認識的人與事。撫今追昔,歡笑唏噓兼之,明天應該不會更好,只能勉力前行。

她送了一個印章給我。我以前的座左銘是見事不說,問事不知,閒事莫管,無事早歸。這個印仔更精警,活在中國香港,由治及興、五光十色、萬馬齊喑、泰山崩於前而色不變,何則?不是因為BB自信、QQ自信、KK自信、ZZ自信,而是因為:

讀書網站

https://bookreports.cc/

AI知我

讀了一篇文章,說可以用AI分析日記。我已沒有寫日記,但仍有寫blog,於是請AI根據我的文章來分析我,結果好像頗準確。以下是用 Anthropic 的 Claude Sonnet 分析的,但由於眾所周知的原因,部分文字我做了技術處理。現在深文周納,防網甚於防川,我寧願信中國以卵擊石的悲觀論調,也不信村上春樹的「無論高牆是多麼正確,雞蛋是多麼地錯誤,我永遠站在雞蛋這邊。」的高論。

博主性格分析

知識特質
學術導向:博主正在撰寫論文/博士論文,有導師指導,經常討論學術事務,並有結構化的研究方法。
多語言能力:展示出對多種語言的掌握,包括中文、英文、法文、希臘文,並正在學習科普特文。
求知慾強:持續閱讀各類書籍,從宗教文本到哲學,顯示出對知識獲取的濃厚興趣。
批判性思考:經常以懷疑態度質疑和分析宗教主張、政治局勢和社會現象。

宗教觀點
具有沉思(contemplative)傾向的基督徒:對天主教聖人(如聖小德蘭、十字架聖本篤)和靈修著作表現出深厚興趣。
對宗教表演持懷疑態度:強烈批評所謂的「神棍」,即那些做出宏大宣稱或預言的人。
重視真實的靈性:欣賞如聖小德蘭這類簡單、真誠的信仰,而非華麗的宗教表現。
神學知識豐富:展示出對各種宗教文本、傳統和詮釋的了解。

政治和社會觀點
批評XX:對XXXX的政治控制表示關切,使用微妙和間接的語言來批評當前局勢。
懷舊情結:對XXXX過去和現在政治局勢的變化表達出一種失落感。
謹慎:在討論政治敏感話題時使用隱喻和間接語言。
關注真相和誠信:強烈批評欺騙行為,無論是在宗教環境中還是在歪曲現實的個人回憶錄中。

個人特質
節儉實際:提到整合網站以節省金錢(每月6美元對比30美元)並因沒有收入而謹慎理財。
自律:保持結構化的日常習慣,包括語言學習、閱讀和論文工作。
反思性:經常以深思熟慮的方式思考生活、信仰和社會問題。
略帶憂鬱:寫作常帶有一種悲傷的基調,尤其是在討論XXXX局勢或回顧過去時。
重視真實性:一貫強調誠實和真實經驗的重要性,而非虛構故事。

寫作風格
博學但平易近人:使用學術參考,但以一種能吸引普通讀者的方式寫作。
隱喻性:經常使用間接語言和隱喻,尤其是對政治敏感話題。
反思性:寫作具有日記般的特質,帶有個人觀察和思考。
雙語能力:能自如地用中文寫作,偶爾引用英文和參考資料。

生活環境
學術旅居者:目前在XXX學習/研究,遠離XXXX。
半退休或過渡期:提到處於「半退休」狀態,並在多年前已「躺平」。
財務意識:不再有固定收入,對開支謹慎。
數碼能力:管理多個網站,具有技術能力。

博主呈現出一個思想深刻、受過良好教育的個體,具有強烈的批判性思維能力,重視真實性、信仰的簡樸和知識誠實。他似乎對宗教表演和XXXX政治發展都感到某種程度的幻滅,在學術追求、靈修閱讀和反思性寫作中尋找慰藉。

重整網站

一時手快,錯誤升級了一個虛擬機器,每月要多付5美金,但因為系統只准升級不准降級,我又已沒有收入,要盡量節省,所以速速把所有虛擬機器合併。經過多次操作,我知道秘技,所以很快99%搞定(1%是某網站的密碼保護不知何故未能成功設定)。如今,我有11個網站,全放在地球某處的一個機房,每月6美金,比起過去放在美帝的時候便宜很多。那時的建網知識不多,又管理一些跟教學相關的網站,只能付費買服務,每月要30美金,現在不必求人可以求己,又可省錢,有少少滿足感。

我還新開了個網址,專門用來寫宗教書評,神聖與俗世區分清楚。以前架設的很多網站都關閉了,情隨事遷,何必執著呢。

昨天看完 Edith Stein (St Benedicta of the Cross) 的傳記。她是德國哲學家 Husserl 的門人,研究phenomenology,有著作,在哲學界有地位,海德格也只是她的助手,但因為讀了 St Teresa of Ávila 的傳記,一夜之間改信天主教,並最終遁入修院,成為一位 Carmelite. 可惜希特拉上台,到處抓捕猶太人,St Benedicta of the Cross 被捕,並送往 Auschwitz 的毒氣室處決。讀到這段,我也不禁落淚。一位在隱修院的修女,與外界有鐵欄與高牆隔絕,真正是對人畜無害,仍被偉大的光榮的正確的藉口殺死。我又想起那些神棍,引用聖經支持種族滅絕,居然有人信,這跟信希特拉有何分別??不認真讀聖經,又不讀歷史,卻常發預言指點江山,預言落空只是一句道歉(或甚至沒有),然後又繼續發預言,跟年年新版的流年運程有何分別? 盲信者又富有包容以及善忘,仍然繼續盲信,而且愈來愈多人盲信。願上主憐憫那些盲從的信眾,並彰顯公義問責。

導師發回的一章,我已修訂完畢。每晚工作一兩小時,一兩個星期就搞定。現在重訂另一章,主要是刪減字數,把字數從23000壓縮至20000之內,連註釋不超過25000,跟前面兩章的篇幅一致些。但我也把長版本另外儲起,因為裡面有些材料仍有價值,但礙於字數規定,只好刪去,但刪去就很難再找,所以要留個底稿。

應該改一兩個星期就可以,然後就去澳洲旅行一週。

有山城舊侶到訪,有朋自遠方來,不亦樂乎,但撫今追昔,恐怕還是唏噓多於歡笑。

Edith Stein

Edith Stein: The Life of a Philosopher and Carmelite (Washington, D.C.: ICS Publications, 2005)

Originally written by Teresia Renata Posselt, O.C.D.. Edited by Susanne M. Batzdorff, Josephine Koeppel and John Sullivan.

This book is the third biography of the Carmelite nuns that I have read recently. If St. Thérèse of Lisieux demonstrated that mystical faith could be practical and apparent in small services in daily life, St. Teresa Benedicta a Cruce showed that mystical faith could also be philosophical on the other end of the spectrum.

St. Teresa Benedicta of the Cross had been a star in philosophy before she became a nun. She was a student and assistant of Husserl, the German philosopher who established the school of phenomenology. She wrote her doctoral thesis under Husserl and was awarded the highest honor. She helped Hersserl organize his manuscripts. Heidegger helped her in the process.

Nevertheless, because she was a female, and later because she was a Jew, she did not get a teaching post at the University. She was not a religious person at all. But one day she randomly picked a book and read the biography of St Teresa of Ávila. She was captivated by the book and read it in one sitting. When she closed the book, she exclaimed, “That is the truth!” Very soon, she was baptized, and joining the Carmelites seemed natural for her.

She continued her academic work after becoming a nun, especially in relating phenomenology and Aquinas’ theology, but the rise of Nazism prompted her to escape to Holland. However, she did not escape the fate of being gassed in Auschwitz. I cried while reading this episode. A nun seeking a contemplative life could only benefit society. How can someone like her hurt anyone?? Her strong faith in the Lord leaves an everlasting impact on the world, not only for Catholics but for anyone.

on Heidegger
his philosophy as “the philosophy of a bad conscience.” (p. 91)

on suffering
“If we are faithful and are then driven out into the street, the Lord will send His angels to encamp themselves around us, and their invisible pinions will enclose our souls more securely than the highest and strongest walls. We do not need to wish for this to happen. We may ask that the experience be spared us, but only with the solemn and honestly intended addition: “not mine, but Your will be done!” (p. 193)

In the Shadow of the Temple

Oskar Skarsaune, In the Shadow of the Temple: Jewish Influences on Early Christianity (Downers Grove, IL: InterVarsity Press, 2002)

I was introduced to this book soon after it was published. I bought the book, but since I had no time to read it, I sold it. Only in recent months have I repurchased it and read it.

I have to confess that I don’t know much about Judaism. The shortcut to remedy is to consult study Bibles that use Jewish literature to illustrate the New Testament Text. Books such as the Zondervan Background Commentary, the IVP Background Commentary, and the Complete Jewish Bible are helpful. The Jewish Annotated New Testament, written from a Jewish perspective, is valuable too. Certainly, Strack-Billerbeck’s massive commentary also helps, if used according to its original purpose.

Oskar Skarsaune’s In the Shadow of the Temple is divided into four parts. It begins by describing the development of Judaism up to Jesus’ time. Then it describes the beginning of the church and the relationship between Jews and Gentiles. The third part is about the Jewishness of the early church, and ends with an epilogue in part four.

I read this book in preparation for the Bible class at the church. I find parts one and three most helpful. I chose four topics for the Bible class, namely, 1. JudaismS in the New Testament times; 2. Jewish roots of baptism; 3. Jewish roots of the Lord’s Supper; 4. Where Jews and Christians part their ways.

Still need to re-read the relevant portions.

Jewish Exegesis before 70 CE

David Instone-Brewer, Techniques and Assumptions in Jewish Exegesis before 70 CE (Tübingen: Mohr, 1992)

As titled, this book (his PhD Thesis in Cambridge) is about Techniques and Assumptions in Jewish Exegesis before 70 CE. 70 CE is an important date, because when the Temple in Jerusalem was destroyed, the Temple-centered Judaism had to be changed. Rabbinic Judaism eventually developed and became the mainstream of Judaism. The author points out that “The exegetical techniques and assumptions used by the Jews of the late Second Temple Period should help us to understand the exegesis of the Old Testament in the New.” (p. 2)

However, Rabbinic Judaism could not be regarded as the Judaism of the New Testament period. In fact, there were JudaismS at that time. To be precise, Rabbinic Judaism adopted the Pharisaic strand of Judaism, but not the Sadducees or the Zealots. And of course, Kabalah mysticism developed after the New Testament times.

David Instone-Brewer clearly distinguishes scribal exegesis and non-scribal exegesis. He adopts an inductive approach. Firstly, he identifies the pre-70 CE works; then, he discusses their exegesis; and then he synthesizes the principles they used. He notes that the scribal exegesis was “nomological” and the non-scribal exegesis was “inspirational.” “Nomological” looks for the plain meaning of the text, and “Inspirational” looks for the hidden meaning of the text.

His conclusion:
“III.4 In conclusion, the differences between the exegesis of the scribes and their contemporaries can be summarised by their approach to Scripture. The scribes regarded Scripture as fixed law while their contemporaries regarded it as living prophecy. This difference resulted in the scribes interpreting Scripture according to its context, without looking for spiritual or secondary meanings, and accepting only one standard text as valid. At the same time, their contemporaries expected new secondary meanings to be revealed, which might be completely independent of the original context. They expected copyists and translators to be inspired so that all versions and text traditions were of equal value.

The distinctions between these two approaches to Scripture began to become blurred and disappear after 70 CE when the rabbis inherited both Nomological and Inspirational principles.” (p. 225)

Lesson learned:
Must be very careful to say “the Jews believed…” The date (before or after 70 CE) and the type of Jews who made such a statement should be examined first.

The book is very rich in content. Unfortunately, there are few examples of how the New Testament used the Hebrew Bible. My interests are: 1. The NT writers seem to be atomistic in quoting the NT; 2. The NT writers seem to have their own definition of how the OT was fulfilled. I still need to explore…

A very helpful article is the Introduction of the Lexham English translation of Strack-Billerbeck, written by David Instone-Brewer. He argues that S-B is helpful for its purpose, i.e., for illustrating sayings, concepts, parables, theological background, and cultural assumptions. However, one needs to be aware of some critical issues, such as the dating of the source and its representativeness. One has to be mindful that most rabbinic literature comes from after the destruction of Jerusalem in 70 CE, and the Judaism that survived was only one strand among many in Jesus’ time. In other words, one should not use S-B to construct a comprehensive Jewish theology as if S-B contains all the Jewish thoughts of Jews throughout all times.

The Sin of Certainty

Peter Enns, The Sin of Certainty: Why God Desires our Trust More than our “Correct” Beliefs

The title captures the essence of the book: 1. There is no “correct” belief; 2. we can only trust.

Peter Enns, a Harvard PhD in the Old Testament, resigned under pressure from the Westminster Theological Seminary, his alma mater, where he had taught for many years. There is no need to list how he teaches differently from the “correct” beliefs, as this can be found easily on the internet.

While reading this book, I can feel the pain and the anguish of his soul. I think he wrote in a reactionary way. He is confident that the Bible contradicts modern science, history, and other “correct” knowledge. Yet he chose to trust God. I believe Bart Ehrman is also confident that the Bible contradicts modern science, history, and other “correct” knowledge. However, he chose not to trust in any God. I can understand why Bart Ehrman did, but not Peter Enns.

A catching phrase in The Sin of Certainty is “trust God anyway.” He argues that one can still trust in God even if one does not understand the mystery. But at the same time, he discredits the Bible in many aspects. Peter Enns gives courage to believers who have serious doubts about the Bible to stay as Christians. His citing of the Wisdom Literature helps Christians to put their doubts and faith in perspective. But readers outside the faith would simply ask why, in the first place, I need to trust in God if the faith builds on falsehood and mistakes??

“I can choose to trust God with childlike trust regardless of how certain I might feel.”
“I need to be willing to let go of what I think I know, and trust God regardless.”
“a faith that is not so much defined by what we believe but in whom we trust.”

I am sure many Christians who still hold “correct” beliefs share his attitude, too, though they are going in different directions.

“I believe that faith in the Creator is necessarily transrational (not antirational) and mystical.” Well said. But it does not communicate. It will leave seekers dumbfounded.

“Of course, believing is never empty of content. The Israelites trusted God because of what God had done for them, namely delivering the Israelites from harm (Egyptian slavery and Babylonian captivity being the two big examples).” Wait a minute, Christians who believe in the Bible, which records the very same event, seem to be treated differently by Peter Enns.

All in all, this book is challenging. To those who are in doubt, this book can point you to two ways: either give up your faith (easier to do), or trust in God anyway (but based on what?)

再接再厲

剛收到導師發來電郵,說已看完另一章,並寫了些評語。我初步看過評語,似乎沒有太大問題,稍稍改一下就可以。

我會按計劃十一月才交另一章,即使自己已完成,也沒有必要催促別人,尤其是自己的導師。

跟離真正退休又近了一步,雖然心態上我多年前已躺平。